Bum Bum Bee Dum, Bum Bum Bee Dum Dum (that's from "Disturbia" by Rihanna. I hope it's stuck in your head the way it's been stuck in mine ALL. DAY. LONG.)
Well it's almost 10pm and I'm waiting for my doxycyline pill to kick in or whatever (I take it at night, and I have to take it at least an hour before bed.) I wanted to take some time to write about the past few days, because they've been interesting and completely different from my normal days here. I am beginning to understand the difference between coming here with a team and coming here on your own to live here for 5 months. I'll just say right now there is a HUGE, GIGANTIC, GINORMOUS DIFFERENCE.
I say all of this because there is a team here visiting. They arrived last Sunday and are staying until Wednesday-ish. One of the folks hanging out with us is Shelly, who works at the Agape office in Modesto. She's here with her boyfriend, Cody. Then there's Phil, Sue, and Paula. Phil and Sue just got married like a year and a half ago, and are both over 50. Phil is a college professor. And Paula is the principal of a school, so the three of them came to Kenya to work with the teaching staff at Agape. I think they have been a big help. But it's also nice to hang out with some Americans. It feels like a bit of home, you know?
Wednesday, we went to the Drop-in Center. The Drop-in Center happens on Wednesdays, and it's a place for street kids to come and get a meal, hear a message, and maybe bathe. It's absolute chaos, and it's terrifying and challenging and something that most days I would rather NOT do. But I know that those kids need Jesus the way I do, and if God tells me to go, I'm gonna get going. I should probably tell you that the first time I went to outreach, I FREAKED out. I walked inside and cried because I was so overwhelmed. This past Wednesday was my third time, and I was much braver. I stepped out of the van and walked right up to the boys and started giving high fives and introducing myself and learning names. I pulled out my camera and the boys started modeling, and doing crazy stunts to be photographed. It was wicked fun. Then one of the boys, Evans, said he wanted to talk to me. So we sat down. He was really, really high. And he told me he wanted to go to school. So I told him to go to school. He said he couldn't because he lived on the street. I told him that he lives on the street because it's HIS choice. There are so many organizations that want to help street kids. But street kids don't want to help street kids. That's why they run away and get high and steal and prostitute themselves. It does not make any sense to me and it makes me angry when these kids beg ME for things when they have the opportunity to change for the better and THEY DON'T WANT TO. So, anyway, Evans told me he wanted to go to school. I asked him if he sniffed glue. He said no. I told him he could be honest with me. He said he didn't sniff glue. I said, Evans, I know you are high right now, so don't lie to me. And he looked at me and said, "I don't sniff glue." I told him that I couldn't help him if he didn't want to help himself. I told him that God wants to help him, but he had to let God help him. And that God wants him to stop getting high, and God wants him to have a home and go to school and that God really wants him to succeed and live a long life. But living on the street and stealing and getting high goes against what God wants. There was a day when I wouldn't have been brave enough to be that honest with someone. I'm not sure if it was the right thing to say. But I know it was the truth, and I don't regret it. I know that God will speak through me if I let him, and I feel like He did that day. This is part of why it's so hard to be here. I wish I could explain it better. But being here is not easy. It's the hardest thing I've ever done. But it is BY FAR the best thing I have ever done. I almost feel like it's not fair to be here, to be doing something that I love doing, that I am GOOD at. STOKED.
On Thursday, we did all of the tourist-y things. Mike and Karen flew to Nairobi for the day to (attempt to) work some stuff out with Paul's adoption. So I was with the visitors. We went to Agape for a little bit in the morning, and then went shopping. Shopping is such an experience here. First we went to Pendeza Weavers. It's a shop that does all of its weaving by hand, from picking the cotton, to spinning it on the looms, to weaving it into table cloths and napkins and blankets and all kinds of good stuff. I bought a really cute purse and some other goodies for some friends back home who are getting married in less than 50 days. Just sayin'. I also picked up a table runner for my momma. I'll definitely be going back before I leave in September. Their stuff is absolutely beautiful. It's a really cool place.
After Pendeza, we drove to Nakumatt (like Wal-Mart) for some reason that I can't remember. Then we went to the shops where you can buy all of the souvenir-type things around here. It was pretty cool because I got to bargain with the shopkeepers. I picked up some pretty cool stuff, and I am very proud of my choices. But I'm more proud that I shaved off over $30 overall. It's strange to me how people try to persuade you to buy things. One of the shops was run by a woman who had a baby on her back. She kept saying, Please buy from me so I can buy my baby lunch. That's always hard for me, because you never know who is telling the truth or not. I told her that I was very sorry, but that she didn't have anything I wanted to buy. But it breaks my heart, you know? You just want to be able to help people, but it's hard because sometimes you think you are doing good things, but you are really just feeding a disease. You are buying into the drug use, and the stealing and cheating a lying and that's always hard for me. I honestly worry about becoming a cynic, becoming jaded and hard-hearted. Maybe I need more compassion. I guess that's something I need to work out with God.
Then we went to lunch at Kiboko Bay. It's my favorite restaurant here. It's right on Lake Victoria (which honestly looks like an ocean, it's THAT big), and it was beautiful in the middle of the afternoon. Then we drove to the Equator. I have to tell you, the Equator is a HUGE letdown. But at this point, it's funny. It's just a statue of a ball that says "Equator" on it. You could drive right by it if you weren't paying attention, haha. But it's definitely worth the 45 minute drive to stand there for 20 seconds and take a picture or two. Yep. We went and hung out at Agape again when we got back into town. I have to be honest with you, I had such trouble being at Agape at first. But for whatever reason, a few weeks ago, everything just CLICKED for me. And now, I can't get enough of it. I love those boys with my whole friggin' heart. One of the boys, Michael, decided that he didn't want me to know his name. So I just decided to call him, "Nyo-yo." (not quite sure on the spelling, but it's the name of a food here. Beans and Corn.) So then he called me "Mutumbu." I just found out that means "intestines." We are good friends now. :)
The next day (Friday) the team drove out to Motoso where "The Farm" is located. It's like a 5 hour drive, and I've already been, so I decided to stay home for the day with Karen. (The Farm, by the way, is Agape's vocational school. The boys that don't really thrive at school can go to the Farm and learn trades like mechanics and masonry. It's a really great thing they've got going on there.) I was home all day, and all I did was write. It was great, I'm not going to lie. I'm writing a lot here. I love it. Then last night we went to dinner and I had mosquitos flying above my head all night, which I always hate. I had a new drink, it was a pineapple soda, and it's AS good as a Stoney, not going to lie.
Today is Saturday. We had Paul's birthday party here at the house today. I guess this is the second time that Paul has celebrated his birthday (he's 13 this year) and so we had 24 kids over at the house today. Our day started with a nice trip to Nakumatt, and then a mad dash to try and set up for this party. The kids were great sports, they did a three-legged race relay and, randomly started doing karaoke and having a dance party. It was great. And Karen made a pretty bomb cake, not gonna lie. I had to iron some sheets to use as the projector for a movie night at Agape. And then we went out to dinner. That was great, because a couple of the boys from Agape came with us. They are kind enough to teach me bits of Kiswahili here and there. And they laugh at my jokes. And they don't make fun of me for being the dumbest, whitest person around here. So I dig it. We sang Rihanna in the back of the truck on the way to Agape for movie night.
We got to Agape at around 6:30 for movie night in the dining hall. You cram almost 70 teenage Kenyan boys into a small room and it's bound to be a hot stinky mess of hot stink. We watched "Evan Almighty" and Shelly had bought the boys soda and popcorn and some candy and it was a great night. I love that the kids think Steve Carrell is funny. When those kids laugh, they LAUGH. I mean, it's ridiculous. And awesome. It's the kind of laughing that makes me laugh at their laughter, you know what I mean? Just so much fun. And then we kind of sat with the kids after the film and talked about it, and a couple of the boys, Caleb and Vincent (I think, you can correct me on that one), got up and said thank you for the movie and the goodies and how blessed they were and that they wanted God to bless us. That always gets me. Some kids don't mean it. But I know that those two did. They are good kids.
I love how Godly these boys are. You spend time at the Outreach center for street kids and you see how far these boys have come at Agape. You can just SEE it. I wish I could explain it more eloquently. I wish that you could see it for yourself, actually, if I'm wishing for things. This is how I know that God is real, and that God is love and mercy. Because He blesses us with a reason to change. And I am blessed enough to be able to see that change. To be a part of that change. I really do love those kids. I don't know all of their names, and I don't know them as well as I could, but I adore them.
So, it's a good day today. Sorry for the really long note. If you made it this far, thank you for reading. I should also tell you that an organization called "Faceless International" that I support is taking two teams to India in January for 10 days. Should I stay or should I go? I've been bitten by the mission bug, haha. If you get time and remember, could you say some prayers for me? I'd love some guidance and clarity for the future. And say some prayers for the boys at Agape. They are great, but there are some that are just hurting. I am sure I will write more about them later, as they have pretty much stolen my heart. :)
Love and miss you all very much.
Riss (Bum Bum Bee Dum, Bum Bum Bee Dum Dum. Now I can officially go to bed.)
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